Don’t blame me for reviewing a Christmas movie before Thanksgiving. Blame Hollywood.
"Popularity Gained Through Intellectual Achievement is Fleeting. You Gotta Cash In While You Can."
All things considered, this latest attempt to adapt Charles Schultz’s famous comic strip could have been so much worse. But like our hapless hero Charlie Brown, “Peanuts” ends up trying a little too hard.
"Don't Change the Man to Fit the Narrative. Change the Narrative to Fit the Man."
I think this film would have been a more successful product if the creators either committed to fictionalizing the events, or to removing every ounce of Hollywood schmaltz. “Our Brand is Crisis” is most potent when it’s mean, and it’s just never mean enough.
"I Would Rather be a Rebel Than a Slave."
A shame. A pity. An intriguing, relevant, lady-led period piece…that leaves me feeling underwhelmed.
"Ghosts Are Real. This Much I Know."
Much like Tom Hiddleston’s butt, this movie was nice but not nearly as impressive as I’d hoped it would be.
"Computers Aren't Supposed to Have Human Flaws; I Don't Want to Give This One Yours."
You ever notice that certain movies are shot specifically with awards season in mind?
"Every Time I Do Anything, I'm the First. It's a Strange Feeling."
See guys, this is what happens when you make a science fiction story that’s not post-apocalyptic or dystopian. Doesn’t it feel nice? Don’t you feel good?
"It's Times Like These You Need Someone You Can Rely On. So Thank You."
It’s nice every once in a while to see a film that gives you exactly what you’re expecting. That’s what I got with “The Intern”: an uncomplicated, sweet film that has nothing whatsoever to say.
"You're Asking How the Watch is Made. For Now, Keep Your Eye on the Time."
“Sicario” is a slow burn, the type of film to plop you in with no context and force you to examine details to find your footing. Luckily, the details are the best part of the film.
"Will You Get Inside the Oven to Clean It?"
I am fascinated by M. Night Shyamalan’s career. Once a critical darling, and then ten years later one of the most hated directors in Hollywood, his name is now mud. The marketing campaigns for his last two films have tried their hardest to hide his involvement. He is in one of the worst positions you can possibly be in as a working director—nobody believes a movie can be good if it has his name on it, even though he has proven in the past to be both popular and a smart storyteller.
Shyamalan’s done something with “The Visit” that nobody bothers to do much anymore. As carefully as he can, as seriously as he can, he tells a simple, well-made story. In that respect, “The Visit” is one of the best films I’ve seen from him in years.
1. Thou shalt drink whenever a character on screen drinks