Coming Soon to Netflix
GUYS. It's almost May 26th. Arrested Development Season 4 is almost within your grasp. AREN'T YOU EXCITED???
What's that? You never watched this show?
Well, you have plenty of time to catch up. With only three seasons, the last of which is technically a half season, up on Netflix, you have no reason to dawdle. This show is genius, in a way that few shows have managed to emulate. The jokes come so quickly, the twists come so out of nowhere, the humor is SO absurd. The ties the show holds to reality, while slim, are tight, which keeps it from flying completely off the rails. It anticipates jokes made at its expense before they happen. As the Fuzzy Masked Man says, "There's just nothing to make fun of."
There's no guarantee that my rules will work for season 4. But I'm sure as hell going to have fun seeing for myself.
What's that? You never watched this show?
Well, you have plenty of time to catch up. With only three seasons, the last of which is technically a half season, up on Netflix, you have no reason to dawdle. This show is genius, in a way that few shows have managed to emulate. The jokes come so quickly, the twists come so out of nowhere, the humor is SO absurd. The ties the show holds to reality, while slim, are tight, which keeps it from flying completely off the rails. It anticipates jokes made at its expense before they happen. As the Fuzzy Masked Man says, "There's just nothing to make fun of."
There's no guarantee that my rules will work for season 4. But I'm sure as hell going to have fun seeing for myself.
"Arrested for Drunk Driving": The Rules
Drink the whitest drinks you can for this game. We drank vodka tonics and white wine. Be careful, though, we hear that vodka goes bad if you leave it out overnight.
Although wine only turns into alcohol if you let it sit, so you're probably good.
Easy Mode
1. Drink for Title Drops. That's every time someone says "Arrested Development". The title and ending credits count.
2. Drink when They Drink. They drink a lot.
3. Drink for Daddy Issues. Wait for it...
4. Pick a Bluth. Drink when their name is said.
5. Drink whenever Tobias does something gay.
6. Drink when the show gets all meta-theatrical. Watch out for the third season, that'll kick your ass.
Medium Mode
All of the above rules apply. Also...
1. Drink for Title drops. Drink for any play on the word "arrest".
2. Drink whenever Gob messes up a trick. Illusion. Whatever.
3. Drink when someone says "No touching!"
4. Drink when someone makes a reference to Charles Schultz' "Peanuts".
5. Drink whenever you see the stair car.
Hard Mode
All of the above rules apply. Also...
1. Daddy Issues: Drink also for Mommy Issues.
2. Drink whenever a Bluth spends money they don't have.
3. Drink whenever someone says "Her?"
4. Drink when a phrase or joke is used in more than one episode that you watch during your game. No cheating.
5. Drink for banners.
1. Drink for Title Drops. That's every time someone says "Arrested Development". The title and ending credits count.
2. Drink when They Drink. They drink a lot.
3. Drink for Daddy Issues. Wait for it...
4. Pick a Bluth. Drink when their name is said.
5. Drink whenever Tobias does something gay.
6. Drink when the show gets all meta-theatrical. Watch out for the third season, that'll kick your ass.
Medium Mode
All of the above rules apply. Also...
1. Drink for Title drops. Drink for any play on the word "arrest".
2. Drink whenever Gob messes up a trick. Illusion. Whatever.
3. Drink when someone says "No touching!"
4. Drink when someone makes a reference to Charles Schultz' "Peanuts".
5. Drink whenever you see the stair car.
Hard Mode
All of the above rules apply. Also...
1. Daddy Issues: Drink also for Mommy Issues.
2. Drink whenever a Bluth spends money they don't have.
3. Drink whenever someone says "Her?"
4. Drink when a phrase or joke is used in more than one episode that you watch during your game. No cheating.
5. Drink for banners.
The Fuzzy Masked Man should be laughing his ass off right about now.
The Players
Our onscreen players tonight are Krissy (me), Seb, and Shirley Whiskas. We talked about our favorite running gags in Arrested Development.
Our offscreen players are...
The Fuzzy Masked Man: Still laughing about the banners (Easy)
Daku: First time player, long time watcher (Easy)
Flux: First time watcher, long time player (Hard)
Have we made a huge mistake with this drinking game? Let's find out!
The Fuzzy Masked Man: Still laughing about the banners (Easy)
Daku: First time player, long time watcher (Easy)
Flux: First time watcher, long time player (Hard)
Have we made a huge mistake with this drinking game? Let's find out!
A Brief Admission
I confess: I had a little bit of help making the game for this week. In anticipation of the returning season and the eventual Arrested Development movie (squee!), some devoted fans have compiled charts and graphs detailing all of the running gags and in-jokes that the show has to offer. Not only that, many of them have an episode-by-episode breakdown of exactly when these jokes happen, how they relate to other jokes, where set-ups for these jokes occur, etc. It's all very exciting. The one I found (which also categorized each joke by the character it's related to) was featured on NPR's website, and you can find it at http://apps.npr.org/arrested-development/.
I basically cherry-picked the list, using my favorite jokes and those that occur most often. Then I added the rule about a joke recurring in another episode watched during the course of the game.
Here are all of the phrases and gags that we caught during our game.
Model home falling apart
"Annyong"
Censoring
“Say goodbye to these!”
footage not found
“A lot of love”
"I've made a huge mistake"
Literal doctor
Magician's alliance
Buster's lost hand,
“Don't call it that”
“Marry me!”
Never nude (dozens of us!)
“No teaching!”
A Bluth imitating a chicken sound
Mrs. Featherbottom
Oscar's the father music
Franklin
"The fact that you call it that means you're not ready."
Boy, that's a long list. Why did I go through the trouble of listing all of those brilliant gags, especially since it'll just seem like gibberish to those who haven't watched the show?
Because we watched five randomly selected episodes of Arrested Development, and NONE of these gags were repeated.
It's true. Maybe we just got lucky. But in two hours of game play, we never used this rule. More often than not, a joke would get used over and over again within the one episode. To be fair, the episodes we watched were spread pretty evenly throughout the series, so maybe they tend to cluster more than I thought. Additional playthroughs of this game are needed.
I AM GOING TO BE PLAYING THIS GAME SO MUCH.
I basically cherry-picked the list, using my favorite jokes and those that occur most often. Then I added the rule about a joke recurring in another episode watched during the course of the game.
Here are all of the phrases and gags that we caught during our game.
Model home falling apart
"Annyong"
Censoring
“Say goodbye to these!”
footage not found
“A lot of love”
"I've made a huge mistake"
Literal doctor
Magician's alliance
Buster's lost hand,
“Don't call it that”
“Marry me!”
Never nude (dozens of us!)
“No teaching!”
A Bluth imitating a chicken sound
Mrs. Featherbottom
Oscar's the father music
Franklin
"The fact that you call it that means you're not ready."
Boy, that's a long list. Why did I go through the trouble of listing all of those brilliant gags, especially since it'll just seem like gibberish to those who haven't watched the show?
Because we watched five randomly selected episodes of Arrested Development, and NONE of these gags were repeated.
It's true. Maybe we just got lucky. But in two hours of game play, we never used this rule. More often than not, a joke would get used over and over again within the one episode. To be fair, the episodes we watched were spread pretty evenly throughout the series, so maybe they tend to cluster more than I thought. Additional playthroughs of this game are needed.
I AM GOING TO BE PLAYING THIS GAME SO MUCH.
George Michael Cera
All three of our base rules got a huge workout during this game, but none hit us as hard as the "Daddy Issues" rule. Patriarchal abuse is a huge theme of this show. In the episodes we saw, George Bluth Sr. faked a heart attack to avoid being convicted for treason (Season 1, episode 22, "Let Them Eat Cake"), kidnapped Lucille to keep her from sleeping with his twin brother (Season 2, episode 16, "Meat the Veals"), and revealed himself as a notorious poisoner known as "The Muffin Man" who killed, among others, one of Michael's elementary school teachers (Season 3, episode 9, "S.O.B's). That's a lot to handle about one person, especially if that person is your father.
At least he's religious.
Then, there's Tobias Funke, who constantly embarrasses his only daughter, Maeby. Like in "Meat the Veals," when...uh...
Oh man, drink. Drink for so many reasons.
We've encountered these kinds of issues before. Being embarrassed by your father, being ashamed of your father, yet still wanting his approval and attention...that's all ground we've tread. But what if a father and son have a basically good relationship, but because of co-dependency problems and errors in communication, they find themselves constantly trying to reassure themselves that the love they share for each other is real?
Enter Michael and George Michael Bluth. George Michael is a woobie played by young Michael Cera ("He definitely has a type" commented Daku), who is constantly living in fear of letting his father down, as he holds him as the example of decent human behavior. Michael, meanwhile, is constantly trying to make sure his son doesn't get screwed up the way he did as a child, but ends up alternately smothering and ignoring him due to the drama going on with the rest of the family. They're never sure of each other, and it usually takes huge gestures or discoveries (such as George Michael finding his old childhood drawings in Michael's office in "Staff Infection") to keep themselves certain that their feelings are getting across. But it never lasts.
This is a less dramatic but more common example of father-son behavior that exists in real life. Parents generally want to do right by their children, and invariably mess things up once in a while. Children, meanwhile, want their parents love and affection, but also want to begin the process of becoming adult and independent, which in turn reminds the parents that they are "running out of time" to do all they feel they can do for their children. This kind of problem shows that conflict doesn't always have to involve anger or screaming fights. Sometimes conflict involves a single misplaced word, or an admission that changes the context of the relationship.
We appreciated the show acknowledging that source of conflict. We drank for George Michael bailing on a TV date with his father to go on a real date with Anne ("Her?" Drink twice!). We drank for Michael walking in on his son reading a letter about him that was actually based on Tobias and assuming his son hated his guts. We drank for Michael trying to guilt-trip George Michael into fleeing the state with him. Issues, one and all. This rule gets more and more interesting.
Enter Michael and George Michael Bluth. George Michael is a woobie played by young Michael Cera ("He definitely has a type" commented Daku), who is constantly living in fear of letting his father down, as he holds him as the example of decent human behavior. Michael, meanwhile, is constantly trying to make sure his son doesn't get screwed up the way he did as a child, but ends up alternately smothering and ignoring him due to the drama going on with the rest of the family. They're never sure of each other, and it usually takes huge gestures or discoveries (such as George Michael finding his old childhood drawings in Michael's office in "Staff Infection") to keep themselves certain that their feelings are getting across. But it never lasts.
This is a less dramatic but more common example of father-son behavior that exists in real life. Parents generally want to do right by their children, and invariably mess things up once in a while. Children, meanwhile, want their parents love and affection, but also want to begin the process of becoming adult and independent, which in turn reminds the parents that they are "running out of time" to do all they feel they can do for their children. This kind of problem shows that conflict doesn't always have to involve anger or screaming fights. Sometimes conflict involves a single misplaced word, or an admission that changes the context of the relationship.
We appreciated the show acknowledging that source of conflict. We drank for George Michael bailing on a TV date with his father to go on a real date with Anne ("Her?" Drink twice!). We drank for Michael walking in on his son reading a letter about him that was actually based on Tobias and assuming his son hated his guts. We drank for Michael trying to guilt-trip George Michael into fleeing the state with him. Issues, one and all. This rule gets more and more interesting.
Of course, we still appreciate the classic approach.
Journey of Discovery
Flux had only ever watched a couple episodes before playing this game. The rest of us had seen the whole show, some of us multiple times. So we had some fun watching her make discoveries about the characters as we saw episodes out of order, and eventually declare that she was going to marathon the show as soon as she got home.
"Wait, what channel was this on?" she asked.
Fox.
"Fox? Really?"
"Fox likes to destroy good things," explained Seb.
"Wait, what channel was this on?" she asked.
Fox.
"Fox? Really?"
"Fox likes to destroy good things," explained Seb.
It's on the list.
There was something nice about watching Flux get fooled by Literal Doctor in "Let Them Eat Cake". The doctor explains that George Sr. is "gone", and the family assumes he is dead. They go into his hospital room to find it empty, and realize that he's actually "gone" on the lamb. Flux's reaction reminded me of the first time I finished Season one.
The kicker came when we watched through "Meat the Veals" and she saw Oscar for the first time.
"Wait," said Flux, "Now he's out of jail and has long hair. What's going on?"
Actually, I explained, that's George Sr's twin brother, Oscar. He's a pothead and has been sleeping on and off with Lucille. He's Buster's real father.
"Oh my God," she said, her face splitting into a grin, "I love this show."
Guys, it may be ten years too late, but we've got another fan!
The kicker came when we watched through "Meat the Veals" and she saw Oscar for the first time.
"Wait," said Flux, "Now he's out of jail and has long hair. What's going on?"
Actually, I explained, that's George Sr's twin brother, Oscar. He's a pothead and has been sleeping on and off with Lucille. He's Buster's real father.
"Oh my God," she said, her face splitting into a grin, "I love this show."
Guys, it may be ten years too late, but we've got another fan!
Speaking of Oscar
I picked Oscar as my choice for the "Bluth name dropping" rule. I wasn't planning on getting too drunk, and I figured the chances of getting an episode with Oscar in it in the first place would be slim.
What I didn't reckon on was that Maeby joins a film studio as an aspiring young executive, and that one episode "S.O.B's" revolves around getting famous people to donate to their cause. The word "Oscar" is thrown around quite a lot. I had to drink all those times.
...My plan didn't work.
What I didn't reckon on was that Maeby joins a film studio as an aspiring young executive, and that one episode "S.O.B's" revolves around getting famous people to donate to their cause. The word "Oscar" is thrown around quite a lot. I had to drink all those times.
...My plan didn't work.
Cheaters Never Prosper
By the time we got to our fourth episode, I was drunk. I had gone through three glasses of wine and was just happy that I hadn't spilled a drink, like Shirley had ("I fell asleep," she explained. "It was my fault.")
We watched the episode "Staff Infection", in which Michael realizes that all of his siblings are on payroll for the Bluth company without actually doing any work for it. I started drinking, because I realized the episode revolved around the Bluths spending money they didn't have.
"No," said Seb, "They're all trying to get money. They're not spending any."
"But the company's spending money on them," I logicked.
"Krissy," said Seb. "What does your rule say?"
Drink whenever a Bluth spends money they don't have.
Thanks for having my back, Seb. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you. Real sorry.
We watched the episode "Staff Infection", in which Michael realizes that all of his siblings are on payroll for the Bluth company without actually doing any work for it. I started drinking, because I realized the episode revolved around the Bluths spending money they didn't have.
"No," said Seb, "They're all trying to get money. They're not spending any."
"But the company's spending money on them," I logicked.
"Krissy," said Seb. "What does your rule say?"
Drink whenever a Bluth spends money they don't have.
Thanks for having my back, Seb. I'm sorry I didn't listen to you. Real sorry.
Not as sorry as this guy.
The Results
After the game, we all did our favorite Bluth impression of a chicken. It was funny.
No, seriously, we can't find it.
Friends, this game was great. It's unpredictable, and with more episodes coming out soon it might stand a chance of surprising even me! There's plenty of tropes you can choose from to play with. Here are some more of my favorites.
Drink whenever Gob feels inferior.
Gob is the eldest son, but he sure doesn't act like it. He was raised to expect everything and wound up with nothing, and he expresses his dissatisfaction often.
Drink when a Bluth flirts with incest.
George Michael and Maeby, of course, cross this line all the time, but a huge plot point in the third season raises the stakes a bit. And if you count brothers-in-law as family, the rule gets even harder.
Whenever a Bluth says something factually incorrect.
This could involve a Bluth lying outright, or saying something they think is true and...just isn't. Not the brightest bunch.
As we eagerly await the new episodes, we also slowly leave television month. Our closing show will involve another classic American family.
Drink whenever Gob feels inferior.
Gob is the eldest son, but he sure doesn't act like it. He was raised to expect everything and wound up with nothing, and he expresses his dissatisfaction often.
Drink when a Bluth flirts with incest.
George Michael and Maeby, of course, cross this line all the time, but a huge plot point in the third season raises the stakes a bit. And if you count brothers-in-law as family, the rule gets even harder.
Whenever a Bluth says something factually incorrect.
This could involve a Bluth lying outright, or saying something they think is true and...just isn't. Not the brightest bunch.
As we eagerly await the new episodes, we also slowly leave television month. Our closing show will involve another classic American family.
Hopefully, we won't be left Groening.
Like what you see? Follow us on Facebook and Twitter, at For Your Inebriation and @KrissyPappau respectively. You'll get weekly updates, behind the scenes drunk talk, and other chatter!
For Your Inebriation is written by Krissy Pappau (Hollis Beck). Video footage is taken by Pooh Daddy (Vincent Graham) and edited by Seb (Amy Yourd). All "Arrested Development" images are owned by 20th Century Fox
For Your Inebriation is written by Krissy Pappau (Hollis Beck). Video footage is taken by Pooh Daddy (Vincent Graham) and edited by Seb (Amy Yourd). All "Arrested Development" images are owned by 20th Century Fox
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