A Wild Drinking Game Appears!
Welcome to For Your Inebriation, a magical land filled with quality entertainment and quality liquor. If you're like me and my friends, you probably enjoy two things: watching television and drinking. And the age old practice that combines these activities is called the Drinking Game. You might be here because you're bored with your old games, or maybe you'd rather worry about the drinking aspect of playing a drinking game and let somebody else do the heavy creative work for you.
We care. And it's because we care that we want to give YOU a hand-crafted drinking game that will suit YOUR needs. And we make games for all genres, so there's bound to be something that suits your taste at some point. This week we're starting with a very special Japanese television show that made us all want to be the very best: Pokemon.
We care. And it's because we care that we want to give YOU a hand-crafted drinking game that will suit YOUR needs. And we make games for all genres, so there's bound to be something that suits your taste at some point. This week we're starting with a very special Japanese television show that made us all want to be the very best: Pokemon.
The Rules
There are three difficulty levels for this game: easy, medium and hard. All of these will get you good and sloshed. But if you're petite, or genetically predisposed to getting drunk easily, MAYBE stay away from hard mode. Trust me, I learned this the hard way.
Try this game with Mike's Hard Lemonade! You know, your gateway drug into the wide world of alcohol. It's surprisingly easy to get wasted on Mike's. If you can't afford it, buy your own lemonade and mix in your favorite liquor.
Try this game with Mike's Hard Lemonade! You know, your gateway drug into the wide world of alcohol. It's surprisingly easy to get wasted on Mike's. If you can't afford it, buy your own lemonade and mix in your favorite liquor.
Hell, that's what we did
Easy Mode
Our standard rules apply. They are...
1. Drink when they drink. Pokemon characters don't often drink alcohol, so drink whenever someone drinks lemonade, or an equally refreshing cool beverage.
2. Drink for Daddy Issues. Maybe Dad wanted them to be CEO of his company instead of a concert pianist. Or maybe he just went out for cigarettes one day and never came back. If a character's got 'em, they'll let you know.
3. Drink for Title Drops. Meaning whenever the title is spoken aloud. For Easy Mode, this means the title of the episode.
Furthermore...
4. Drink whenever someone says the word "Pikachu" (except for Pikachu).
5. Drink whenever someone catches a Pokemon
6. Drink whenever Team Rocket makes an appearance (this means whenever they begin their motto or enter dramatically)
7. Drink when Ash makes a call to Professor Oak
8. Drink whenever Ash (or another trainer) looks up something on the Pokedex
Medium Mode
All the above rules apply. Also...
1. Drink whenever someone says the word "Pikachu" including Pikachu. This doesn't mean "Pika-pi" or "Pi-pika" or "Chuuuu". Pikachu has to say his full name.
2. Drink whenever a pokemon evolves. Two drinks if the Pokemon is in Ash's party at the time. The evolution must occur onscreen.
3. Drink when Brock attempts to flirt with a girl. If Brock isn't in this episode, first cry. Then, drink whenever Tracy sketches something. Then talk badly about Tracy behind his back.
4. Drink when Team Rocket fails to complete their motto. This happens more often than you'd think.
5. Drink whenever someone mentions Gary, Ash's rival. Drink twice if Gary actually shows up.
Hard Mode
All the above rules apply. Also...
1. Drink for Title Drops. In Hard Mode, this means whenever someone says the word "Pokemon". This includes the opening credits.
2. Drink when Team Rocket show up in silly disguises. This includes James cross-dressing.
3. Drink whenever someone makes a pun.
4. Drink whenever Pokemon talk to each other in Pokespeak. Two drinks if the trainer claims to understand what it says.
5. When Gary shows up, drink for the entire time he remains onscreen.
Our standard rules apply. They are...
1. Drink when they drink. Pokemon characters don't often drink alcohol, so drink whenever someone drinks lemonade, or an equally refreshing cool beverage.
2. Drink for Daddy Issues. Maybe Dad wanted them to be CEO of his company instead of a concert pianist. Or maybe he just went out for cigarettes one day and never came back. If a character's got 'em, they'll let you know.
3. Drink for Title Drops. Meaning whenever the title is spoken aloud. For Easy Mode, this means the title of the episode.
Furthermore...
4. Drink whenever someone says the word "Pikachu" (except for Pikachu).
5. Drink whenever someone catches a Pokemon
6. Drink whenever Team Rocket makes an appearance (this means whenever they begin their motto or enter dramatically)
7. Drink when Ash makes a call to Professor Oak
8. Drink whenever Ash (or another trainer) looks up something on the Pokedex
Medium Mode
All the above rules apply. Also...
1. Drink whenever someone says the word "Pikachu" including Pikachu. This doesn't mean "Pika-pi" or "Pi-pika" or "Chuuuu". Pikachu has to say his full name.
2. Drink whenever a pokemon evolves. Two drinks if the Pokemon is in Ash's party at the time. The evolution must occur onscreen.
3. Drink when Brock attempts to flirt with a girl. If Brock isn't in this episode, first cry. Then, drink whenever Tracy sketches something. Then talk badly about Tracy behind his back.
4. Drink when Team Rocket fails to complete their motto. This happens more often than you'd think.
5. Drink whenever someone mentions Gary, Ash's rival. Drink twice if Gary actually shows up.
Hard Mode
All the above rules apply. Also...
1. Drink for Title Drops. In Hard Mode, this means whenever someone says the word "Pokemon". This includes the opening credits.
2. Drink when Team Rocket show up in silly disguises. This includes James cross-dressing.
3. Drink whenever someone makes a pun.
4. Drink whenever Pokemon talk to each other in Pokespeak. Two drinks if the trainer claims to understand what it says.
5. When Gary shows up, drink for the entire time he remains onscreen.
Saying "Gary Oak" three times while staring into a mirror won't get rid of him. Maybe drinking will.
The Players
Our onscreen players tonight are Krissy Pappau (me), Sandy B'Drinkin and Pooh Daddy. They each had to complete a task that demonstrates their motor skills while sober. This episode, they drew Pikachu.
Our off-screen players for tonight are:
The Fuzzy Masked Man: Sometimes he fantasizes about stealing Pokemon (Medium Mode)
The Bishop: She's wondering what kind of God exists in the Pokeworld, and ponders what He has wrought (Medium Mode)
Seb: (S)he likes the episodes that give you seizures (Hard Mode)
Shirley Whiskas: She could beat Jessie in a beauty contest...or a boxing match (Hard Mode)
What will become of our brave heroes? We'll find out in this week's episode of For Your Inebriation!
The Fuzzy Masked Man: Sometimes he fantasizes about stealing Pokemon (Medium Mode)
The Bishop: She's wondering what kind of God exists in the Pokeworld, and ponders what He has wrought (Medium Mode)
Seb: (S)he likes the episodes that give you seizures (Hard Mode)
Shirley Whiskas: She could beat Jessie in a beauty contest...or a boxing match (Hard Mode)
What will become of our brave heroes? We'll find out in this week's episode of For Your Inebriation!
Our Heroes Set Out on Their Journey
We chose five episodes randomly from the first 500 odd episodes of the 4Kids dub of Pokemon. I've only watched up to episode 150 or so, so I thought it'd be cool to see what kind of things Ash and co. get up to in the way later episodes.
Turns out they don't do much. Ash is a little older, and while Brock's come back to journey with him around Hoenn, Misty flew the coop and she's been replaced by these two wet blankets, Max and his sister May.
Turns out they don't do much. Ash is a little older, and while Brock's come back to journey with him around Hoenn, Misty flew the coop and she's been replaced by these two wet blankets, Max and his sister May.
Seb thinks she's cute. Maybe like a dopey puppy is cute.
May got herself kidnapped by a Skarmory within 60 seconds of the first episode we watched (#349-"Grass Hysteria"). She also has no idea how Pokemon work, having spent a lot of time in this episode getting chased by grass Pokemon after siccing her Torchic on them, because she forgot that FIRE is strong against GRASS. It's a slightly more complicated version of Rock, Paper Scissors, honey. Don't strain your brain.
"How can you mess this up? Your world is color coded!" -The Fuzzy Masked Man
By contrast, Ash has grown more capable as a trainer. For example, he's more hands-on; in "What you Seed is What you Get" (episode 317), he teaches his Treeko how to use Bullet Seed by demonstrating himself using watermelon seeds. That's not the Ash I know. The Ash I know handled his disrespectful Charizard by yelling at him and making empowering speeches.
Since a lot of our rules rely on the characters being incompetent, this made the game easier. But Hard Mode still got their workout. The most sips were taken that night because of the Title Drop rule, followed only by the Pikachu rule (that kicked ALL of our asses). Ash and company, especially Team Rocket, can't get enough of the little guy.
Since a lot of our rules rely on the characters being incompetent, this made the game easier. But Hard Mode still got their workout. The most sips were taken that night because of the Title Drop rule, followed only by the Pikachu rule (that kicked ALL of our asses). Ash and company, especially Team Rocket, can't get enough of the little guy.
Nobody can resist his magnetic personality
Playing this game raised a lot of questions. Rational, thought-provoking questions, like...
How Old is Jessie Anyway?
Nobody knows. I wanna say, seventeen?
"I'm sorry, she's like, in her early thirties," protests Shirley Whiskas. Shirley marked Jessie as her main object of scorn, which only intensified as the night wore on. The rest of us didn't mind. I think we all wished we could see how that fight would play out.
Jessie's age is much like her relationship with James: fun to think about, but we may never get a clear answer.
"I'm sorry, she's like, in her early thirties," protests Shirley Whiskas. Shirley marked Jessie as her main object of scorn, which only intensified as the night wore on. The rest of us didn't mind. I think we all wished we could see how that fight would play out.
Jessie's age is much like her relationship with James: fun to think about, but we may never get a clear answer.
"Ooooh, we're so infuriatingly platonic!"
Who In Their Right Mind Would Let Ash Ride a Horse?
In episode #33, "The Flame Pokemon-athon", professional Ponyta Rider Laura Laramie injures herself and asks Ash to take her place in the upcoming Great Pokemon Race (That phrase comes up a lot. Guess how much we drank).
Ash proves himself incompetent. We could have predicted that ("He has a giant 'L' on his hat! He's clearly a loser!" says The Fuzzy Masked Man). But after several tries grappling with Ponyta's "intense flame", Ash manages to redeem himself. Ponyta even evolves into Rapidash mid-race (Drink!).
Only Pooh Daddy stood up for Ash. "But guys," he cried, "What about the intense flames in their hearts?" And it's true, in the Pokemon world, passion counts for a lot. Which is why Ash got as far as he did in the first place.
Ash proves himself incompetent. We could have predicted that ("He has a giant 'L' on his hat! He's clearly a loser!" says The Fuzzy Masked Man). But after several tries grappling with Ponyta's "intense flame", Ash manages to redeem himself. Ponyta even evolves into Rapidash mid-race (Drink!).
Only Pooh Daddy stood up for Ash. "But guys," he cried, "What about the intense flames in their hearts?" And it's true, in the Pokemon world, passion counts for a lot. Which is why Ash got as far as he did in the first place.
Shine on, you crazy diamond
Is Ash Eating a Fried Magikarp?
Well done, Japan. Very clever.
Actually, what Ash has here is a Japanese dessert called Taiyaki. It's fried dough filled with red bean paste. We all kind of freaked out. Our imaginations...they ran wild for a hot second.
Are We Going to be Alone Forever?
In episode 117 "The Trouble with Snubbull", we meet a sad, lonely Snubbull who has chosen Meowth as her beloved. Tired of her Disney Princess level luxury, she dreams of more and escapes into the woods. Team Rocket takes advantage of Snubbull's obsession with Meowth's tail (ahem) and tries to capture her to claim a reward from her owner, Madame MuchMoney.
Every goil's dream
We all felt Snubbull's pain. Every one of us at some point has fallen for someone who couldn't care less. Which is why it felt so satisfying when Snubbull evolved into Granbull and sent Team Rocket flying (hey, drink! The evolution rule got a lot of drinks too!)
Cue the James Blunt music
What Happens to Team Rocket When they Blast Off?
Seb's theory is that they land in Pokemon Purgatory ("Poketory" if you will) where all their punishment at the end of the episodes gets doled out. So how do they get out of there?
According to resident theological expert, The Bishop, "As soon as the coin in copper sings, the soul from Purgatory springs". All they'd have to do to be free of their past sins is pay a small fine, or "Indulgence". One thing we know about Team Rocket is that they are constantly broke. I guess now we know why.
According to resident theological expert, The Bishop, "As soon as the coin in copper sings, the soul from Purgatory springs". All they'd have to do to be free of their past sins is pay a small fine, or "Indulgence". One thing we know about Team Rocket is that they are constantly broke. I guess now we know why.
What's Brock Like in Bed?
Sandy B'Drinkin sums it up best.
"Brock used Magnitude! But nothing happened!"
Sorry, Brock. You flirt way too hard (Drink! Drink! Drink!). Are you overcompensating for something?
"Brock used Magnitude! But nothing happened!"
Sorry, Brock. You flirt way too hard (Drink! Drink! Drink!). Are you overcompensating for something?
Who Will Open this Bottle of Rum?
We finished our supply of spiked lemonade halfway through the third episode and had to make new drinks. I had trouble opening a brand new bottle of rum.
Seb gallantly stepped forward. "Seb will open the rum!" (s)he crowed. I gave Seb the bottle and sat down.
Two seconds later, I heard Seb cry out "The Bishop will open the rum!"
The Bishop had no problem. Clearly she's made of stronger stuff than Seb or I.
Seb gallantly stepped forward. "Seb will open the rum!" (s)he crowed. I gave Seb the bottle and sat down.
Two seconds later, I heard Seb cry out "The Bishop will open the rum!"
The Bishop had no problem. Clearly she's made of stronger stuff than Seb or I.
Where is Gary?
Previously on the Pokemon drinking game, Gary has shown up nine times out of ten. I made the rule because I thought he only showed up every fifty episodes or so. That's not true. In the first season, he shows up constantly. In some episodes, he's a major character who is crucial to the plot.
We got lucky. Don't get cocky. Gary will fuck you up.
We got lucky. Don't get cocky. Gary will fuck you up.
Why is that Electrode Disguised as a Watermelon?
Your guess is as good as mine
We played for just over two hours, counting kazoo breaks and drink refills. Here's what we found.
The Aftermath
This game turned us into babbling morons. There's a few things we noticed while playing that we wish we'd thought of, so here's some custom rules for those of you who want to drink hardcore.
Drink for Wobbuffet
In Johto, Jessie gets a Wobbuffet, who serves the same purpose that Misty's Psyduck did in the first season. He pops out of his pokeball at inappropriate times and is generally useless. Wobbuffet is way better at this gag than Psyduck ever was, and his appearances are often accompanied by some great visual gags like revolving doors, strange costumes, etc.
Drink whenever Team Rocket digs a hole. Drink again if somebody falls into it. Drink twice if that somebody is a member of Team Rocket.
Jessie and James love to dig traps. The reason they continue after all this time is because they usually work. The twerps find themselves underground more often than they'd like, but unfortunately Team Rocket is hit with friendly fire just as often.
Drink if a joke is reused in at least two different episodes during your evening
The weirdest things pop up over and over again. Like somebody swinging in on a vine when they're coming to the rescue (episodes 177 and 349). Or a Team Rocket member crying out "Jane! Stop this crazy thing!" when their giant robot starts to go haywire (episodes 33 and 349).
Really, Pokemon writers? A Jetson's reference? That's what you decide to reuse? For shame.
Guys, thanks for reading! We learned a lot from our Pokemon adventures. We'll be playing again next week with a new movie or TV show. If you'd like to suggest something for us to watch, write it in the comments below. Have fun trying this at home! Don't do anything we wouldn't do.
Drink for Wobbuffet
In Johto, Jessie gets a Wobbuffet, who serves the same purpose that Misty's Psyduck did in the first season. He pops out of his pokeball at inappropriate times and is generally useless. Wobbuffet is way better at this gag than Psyduck ever was, and his appearances are often accompanied by some great visual gags like revolving doors, strange costumes, etc.
Drink whenever Team Rocket digs a hole. Drink again if somebody falls into it. Drink twice if that somebody is a member of Team Rocket.
Jessie and James love to dig traps. The reason they continue after all this time is because they usually work. The twerps find themselves underground more often than they'd like, but unfortunately Team Rocket is hit with friendly fire just as often.
Drink if a joke is reused in at least two different episodes during your evening
The weirdest things pop up over and over again. Like somebody swinging in on a vine when they're coming to the rescue (episodes 177 and 349). Or a Team Rocket member crying out "Jane! Stop this crazy thing!" when their giant robot starts to go haywire (episodes 33 and 349).
Really, Pokemon writers? A Jetson's reference? That's what you decide to reuse? For shame.
Guys, thanks for reading! We learned a lot from our Pokemon adventures. We'll be playing again next week with a new movie or TV show. If you'd like to suggest something for us to watch, write it in the comments below. Have fun trying this at home! Don't do anything we wouldn't do.
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